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| Wow. an amazing year. let me go into my memory bank.. Places I went to... 1. In July, I bought my new car (Prius) and an iPhone 4, which is currently the latest phone. 2. In August, went to London, Dubrovnik, Cambridge, Venice, Florence, Milan, and Rome 3. In November, went to the South- Alabama football game, Memphis where MLK was shot, the delta of Mississippi, Nashville, Kentucky bourbon trail. 4. Celebrated New Year in Big Bear, went to ski in Mammoth couple times 5. in April, went to Taiwan 6. Camped in Big Bear, backpacked at Golden Trout Wilderness part of Sequoya park. 7. Drove Clint Eastwood in a golf cart at Morgan Freeman's lifetime achievement awards. 8. Won lots of money at Commerce, but then lost a lot in Vegas I still have long ways to go. I've realized that everyone is much simpler than I thought. Major decisions are not made by complicated procedure, but by instinct of very few. I hope when I read this later, the places will spark something in the memory bank. I've become so much more mature! go me! maybe. | | |
| As Internet is getting more complex, I find myself censoring myself a lot more. Some people from work even became my facebook friends which is a scary thought. In the end, however, who gives a shit.
It is June 2010, just watched the Laker game, it was fun.
I am not sure what to type, but I promised myself (did it just now) to add a new weblog every year. My relationship with my dad is getting my testy, as he annoys the crap out of me. however, after spending the whole year doing stuff, I feel very happy. To recap this year from memory
1. Las Vegas. Went there multiple times.
A. With Hirom, Felix, Nina- stayed at the beautiful Aria hotel, had a filet mignon, and saw the show KA. Oh yea and went there on a mercedes.
B. With Adrian- stayed at the Palazzo- double door entrance. a bathrooms with multiple sources of water
C. With the gang from 11842 goshen
D. gone too many times
2. Big Bear camping. It snowed, and it was awesome
3. Moved in April
This weekend was great
Friday night- rode on the bike with Jae, ate some shwarma in the end
Saturday- went to my grandmothers, played 3 on 3 basketball (our team of Rex and Kevin lost 1-11), quickly went to the beach to meet up Kaha, Simon...ended watching Imaginareium of Doctor Parnassus. Then decided to crash Nico's birthday, and was up till 4
That was fun
Well- lets end this superficial entry. and rock on!
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| Dear Pavel,
You barely remembered this website, you barely remember your password, but this is your life, and its time for you to revisit.
You are 25 years old. Quarter century old, some sense has been knocked into my head. You went to Israel again with bunch of strangers, you met people like you from Israel. You are talking like a retard using the word you. Your grandfather has cancer. Your dad has a heart condition that will be probably kill him within the next year. Your grandmother's memory is failing. In 2009, you somehow visited some ucla sorority with a mark to come upstairs, you went to Las Vegas, you went to San Fransisco, you camped at Joshua tree, you get drunk too many times, you spend most of your time on the job, and by the time you get back you are way too tired. Lots of other shit hapenned, don't even remember. You talked your way into a free haircuit with this cute Philipino lady. You are still a sucker.
You learned paragraphs. You begin to realize that the secret is to be yourself. If yourself is not good enough, then fuck em. This world is built by ego-maniacs for ego-maniacs. The shy people die away, and evolution takes cares of them. Who are the richest people? The most confident and the loudest. That is life. HOWEVER, you will not be loud, you will live the life the way you want it to be.
Age 25 will probably be the best year of your life. You spent the whole night in the hospital when you fractured that elbow when you flipped on a bike, without wearing a helmet. You had back spasms for 2 days when you couldn't move. You discovered Codein. You had a sick ass flu when you came back from Israel. You get tired during basketball, and you are a quitter. you are the best. you still take your dad to hockey and basketball games. I love my dad.
At work, these people love you. your ability to focus is unmatched by your peers. All my life I tried to think one step ahead, however what the hell is the point. I really want to be thinking like a 90-year by age of 35. Right I am around 40, but could be fooling myself. These paranoid feelings are not healthy.
You barely play poker, you realize who gives a shit.
You live the life your way. Your room is a mess, because who cares. You drive like a maniac, people give you the finger at least once a week. You treat your car like shit. You are not looking to buy a house, even though the time is perfect. You don't buy stocks, cuz you are too stupid to make money. Your financial life is automated, all the bills get paid automatically, and work deposits the money into the bank account.
WHAT HTE FUCK AM I TALKING bout. Who cares. You have at best 50 years of life left. Should I speed it up? Should live life without fear of death? Is it better just to do really what i want? I want to find where FUN is for me.
My life is good on paper. But I need to step it up, that sounds so bad. I need to stop being calm, and just say what i want every single day of my life.
Longest blog ever? Time to read what i wrote in the past. oh yea my childhood friend congratulated me with victory day, but i havent responded it ;)
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| THANK GOD I WENT TO ISRAEL
"Your task, as a
person interested in personal growth, is to understand the world in a truly objective
fashion, and how you fit into the world, rather than how the world fits into
your life."
I have discovered life once over again. The world for me is so different. No longer do I care about Finances, Relationships, or being healthy. That was very immature of me. Now I just care about fucking living, and helping others in living. Now that I approach my 24th birthday, I realize that I better start thinking about really LIVING. This bullshit of being on the grid of life will stop.
I realized that I have to CARPE DIEM long time ago, but this is 4 real. I've gotta be frank with myself. The only person accountable to my life is me. LIFE is very simple.
I also realized that as an INTP, I must live by the following 10 rules.
- Feed Your Strengths! Realize your gift at mastering
logical problems and situations, and give yourself plenty of opportunities
to exercise your abilities.
Much of your sense of well-being will come from these experiences.
- Face Your Weaknesses! We all have weaknesses. Recognizing
your weaknesses for what they are (without beating yourself up) will
give you the power to change your life for the better.
- Talk About Your Thoughts. Discussing your ideas and perceptions with
others will help you to develop your Extraverted INtuition, and thus your understanding of
the world. How well you use your auxiliary function is very important to your overall
health and happiness.
- Listen to Everything Try not to dismiss anything
immediately. Let it soak in, and then apply judgement. Try not to
dismiss things that are alogical - they are not illogical.
- Be Aware of Others Understand that everyone has
their own lives and their own perspectives. Everyone has something
to offer. Try to identify people's personality type.
- Recognize Social Principles. Realize that our society functions around
some basic social principles, and that our society would fail unless those principles are
recognized and upheld. In a democracy, people vote. At a red stoplight, people stop.
If people stopped voting because it wasn't important them, who would be
in power? If people stopped stopping at red stop lights because it didn't fit into their
plans, how could we drive safely? Your priorities and plans are important, but you must
recognize that the external world's agenda is also important. Don't dismiss the importance
of principles that don't affect your life directly.
- Get Out of Your Comfort Zone Understand that the only way to
grow is to get outside of your comfort zone. If you're uncomfortable with an idea or
situation because you're not sure how to act, that's good! That's an opportunity for
growth.
- Identify and Express Your Feelings You may have a hard
time understanding how you feel about someone. It's important that
you do figure this out. Don't lead someone on with your ambivalence. If you determine
that you value the person, tell them so every time you think of it. This is the best way
to make them feel secure in your affections, and so to promote a long-lasting relationship.
- Be Accountable for Yourself Remember that no one has
more control over your life than you have. Don't be a victim.
- Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself with fear
and dark expectations.
Remember that a positive attitude often creates positive situations.
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| hey me. I try to be the best in everything i do. SCRATCH that. I try to have fun in anything i do, this allows me to be the best LONG-TERM. Sure you might work harder than me, but you will burn out, and I will pass you. It is a FACT, that I am the laziest guy ever. This allows me to be super efficient, cuz i know, i am so lazy that i wont do anything manually. It forces me to create formula, it forces me to think on the higher level, it forces me to think LONG-TERM. Right now the long-term plan is blank. I do not want to rise through the dumb corporate ladder, big whoop u get more money, big whoops u get to buy a shiny car, or a house by the water, or any house. its all bullshit, u cant take that to the grave, or anything to the grave.
so why talk about having fun. this is fun, making fun of the world that i live in. It is fun to think that you are above it all ,but you are not. You are one in 6 billion people, you are one in 100 billion people that has ever lived. You will die just like veryone else. You will try combat, you will try to ratiolinize. but like steve jobs said, death is the greatest invention. it forces the human civilization to work hard, knowing they have no time to procrastinate. I know i have a limited time on this planet, so why do i spent more than half of my precious time, sitting in a cubicle making money for some old farts in Japan? I do not know why. I have been brainwashed, i am fuckin sick of it.
Angry blog continues. Anger is natural, anger helps me find solutions. Solutions that go beyond solving my ego trips. I need a solution. Religion sucks, but i think i need to find jesus, and then i a calm down.
i am crazy. i just have to accept this fact. i feel like i think so different from other people. everyone is so focused on a task at hand, its mind boggling how quickly they lose the big picture. Who gives a fuck.
done!
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